It contains some of the deep-seated belief systems and thoughts that we harbor beneath our conscious awareness, usually rooted in and stemming from childhood.It’s no surprise, then, that the subconscious has been hugely implicated in self-sabotaging behaviors.It’s easy to get drawn into society’s lie that having a partner is the one and only way to be happy.

If you’re the type of woman who always jumps from relationship to relationship with no end in sight, you’re setting yourself up for an emotional rollercoaster — one whose destination is always towards procuring someone else’s validation. To be in a relationship with yourself rather than with someone who makes you feel even more lonely.

To give yourself permission to let go of the person you tried to be in all of your relationships in order to become who you were really meant to be.

Her writing has been featured on The National Domestic Violence Hotline, The Huffington Post, Psych Central, Elephant Journal, Dollhouse Magazine, The West 4th Street Review, Thought Catalog, the Feministing Community blog, and Harvard-trained psychologist Dr. Her interests include psychology, sociology, education, gender studies and mental health advocacy.

Her blog, Self-Care Haven, has 2.6 million views worldwide and her work has been endorsed and shared by numerous clinical psychologists, mental health practitioners, bestselling authors, and award-winning bloggers.

Yet most of us focus on what is already within our conscious awareness, rather than addressing the internal programs that are driving our everyday actions, to manifest our desires.

Psychologist Carl Jung conceptualized our disowned parts, our “dark side” and repressed desires as “the shadow.” Unfortunately, many of us do not know what is in our shadow – and these disowned parts may still be driving the show in creating our reality.Self-harm is often a maladaptive coping mechanism for deep pain.Those who self-harm are usually trying to cope with feelings of great distress they feel they don’t have the resources to deal with otherwise.Shahida Arabi is the author of three #1 Amazon bestselling books in psychology and self-care.She graduated with a Master's from Columbia University and studied English Literature and Psychology as an undergraduate student at NYU, where she graduated summa cum laude and was President of its National Organization for Women (NOW) chapter.Limerence is an intense and deep state of involuntary infatuation with another person - to the point of obsession.